Calling: How do I know?

I know I might not be an expert on calling but it is something that I have been thinking about a lot lately especially this weekend and I will tell you why later on. I had always been taught that God had a calling on my life and although knowing that was comforting, there was a sense of discontentment that came along with that. How would I know what my calling was? What if I missed it or did the wrong thing?

From personal experiences and help from some adults I have talked to, I have a couple guidelines that I used to figure out my calling and to help me pick my major for college (which I have changed twice since  being in college for almost two semesters.) Once in a meeting with my home pastor he asked me what my passions were/ What were the things that got me fired up, either negatively or positively? This was a couple years ago and at the time I told him one thing that broke my heart was teen pregnancy because I was starting to see it more and more at my school. This is still true about me today but I have been able to expand on his question as I am going in my faith and learning who I really am. I have a passion for teenagers and the issues they face in daily life. I believe that if you can get to kids because for they get older and too ingrained in their own ways of thinking, you can bring more people to Christ and the teens themselves will live better lives. Adolescence is a crucial stage in anyones life. Most adolescence face heartbreak for the first time, are exposed to drugs and alcohol, go through their parents divorces, death of grandparents or sudden deaths (which are often times the worse, from personal experience.) This is a very hard time in life and that is where my passion is, therefore that is where my calling is.

Not to say that everything you are passionate has to be your career. I have a heart for hurting children overseas. I am going on my first mission trip this summer but as of now I do not intend on being a full-time missionary. Although I believe I could benefit from being a full-time missionary that is not where my heart is fully set. God calls us all to different areas of ministry because no one can do everything on their own. Being a missionary can be a part of my Youth Ministry calling. For example, this summer I am going on a mission trip with the youth group that I work with. Not only will I be helping the people of the Dominican Republic but I will be helping the kids in my youth group, the ones that I invest so much time and love into.

The reason I have been thinking about calling so much lately is because on Saturday I went to the CPYU Hope and Healing for Broken Kids seminar in Monroeville with one of my ministry classes. I did not expect the seminar to have the effect that it did on me. We discussed topics like self injury, which I have never really been exposed to, and suicide, which after the loss of my friend two Christmas seasons ago to suicide, touched home for me. The speaker read journal entries from teens dealing with depression, anger, and self injury. I felt myself taking on the burdens of the kids I was learning about. I just wanted to cry out and hug them. I was so effected by this conference that I began to question my calling. I began to think of the future and how every day the lives of the teens I worked with would weigh heavily on me. It would hurt like I was hurting now, maybe even worse because I would know these teens personally. Could I handle this? Was this really my calling?

Romans 8:28 

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

I was learning about passion. What it means to really care. God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love Him. My heartache was good. My passion will make my ministry stronger and more affective. Without heartache, how could I help teenagers going through such devastating times in their lives? Rather than turning away from my calling this weekend has brought me that much closer to it. I can see vividly the work that I need to do to aid these broken kids. I know now that I have to reach these kids. God has appointed kids just for me to talk to, just for me to love on. I may be the only person that loves that teen on earth, and its my responsibility to show them that not only do I love them but there's a God who made them and loves them so much.

Challenge of the Day

Think about your passions. What drives you? What gets your blood boiling? What makes you happiest? When you can figure some of this out you will be so much closer to your calling and figuring out what God has for you to do. It will not always be easy but it will be worth it. You will get satisfaction of a good job here on earth and satisfaction knowing that you are making your Father proud. He loves you so much that He has given you passion. Do not get discouraged when your heartbreaks. It is a sin of passion.

Love in Christ

Until later Bloggers,

Court

Learning to Love Yourself

Self esteem is such a huge issue, for boys and girls alike. We are constantly looking to other people to build us up. The more people that like us, think we're attractive, or think we are good people the better we feel about ourselves. We look to relationships as a sign of worthiness. You can sit here and read this and say that this is not true for you, but you are either confused or just lying or got it together a lot more than I do. It is natural to look to other people to determine your own self worth. For me, this is one of my biggest struggles. I look to people to build me up, because on my own I do not feel good about myself. There is always someone better or better looking. This is a real challenge for me, a very personal part of my life that I may regret blogging about later.


I wish more than anything that I could find my self worth in Jesus Christ and who He says I am. I believe with my whole heart I will never be satisfied until I learn to love myself like my Creator loves me. I truly believe that but applying it to my life and making it a reality is one of the hardest things I have ever tried to do. I wish I could write this blog and tell you here is how I perfected my self esteem and here is how you can do it too but I can't do that yet. Maybe the sole purpose of this blog is so that we can look back on this someday and see where God has brought me from.


No one is perfect. We all know that we can see it everyday in everything we do. We all have struggles that seem to almost completely overcome us, this is mine. Self esteem is my struggle but I know God can bring me out of this. He has a plan for me that I cannot fulfill until I get this taken care of. 


Challenge of the Day:
Address your struggle. Get real about it. God knows your struggle and somewhere inside you do too. Admit your struggle(s) to God and ask Him to take care of them. Whether your struggle is self esteem like me, or a substance addiction, or maybe you struggle with pornography, we all have struggles its okay to admit them to God. He wants to help you. He wants to be the one who delivers you from the heartache. Let Him. See what He can do with your life when you let Him take over. This is a challenge for me as well as you. We'll do it together and I will blog about my progress.


Here are some scriptures for anyone struggling with self esteem or self worth:

Psalm 139:13-14

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

1 Peter 3:3-4

Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.

Song of Solomon 4:7 

You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.

1 Samuel 16:7

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”

Love in Christ

Until Later Bloggers,

Court